Sometimes you are not able to make lemonade out of those lemons!

Lately it seems that life has not been providing me with fresh lemons to make lemonade out of. I am very vocal about being an open book in all my affairs. Most recently on February 13, 2014 I became sick and tired of being sick and tired and began on my journey of a CLEAN and SOBER life.

Mind you, I have not been floating on a pink cloud thinking that yeah, I no longer drink or use so life is going to be PERFECT! But I also did not expect certain aspects of my life to really start causing me issues. They say that the first year of sobriety is the hardest on your body! That is a crock, I am here to tell you that the first six months are the most hellish.

Don’t get me wrong, I am excited that I am almost to the six month mark of being clean and sober. My concern is that during this first six months health issues that were there all along have become more predominant. I have suffered from chronic back pain for a good three years specifically degenerative disc disease, and degenerative scoliosis and they have grown progressively worse. I did not work for 6 1/2 months due to my previous issues with my addictions in which I gave away a job that I loved. Now because of all the pain that I am suffering I may lose my current job.

Now I have a sister that would probably say, “Suck It Up” but I am having a very hard time. I am unable to sit for longer than ten minutes without the pain truly kicking in. The painkillers I have been given make me sleepy and I have expressed that I cannot take them during the day. Acetaminophen and Ibuprofen no longer work. So I stand for a few minutes, but I can only stand for five to ten minutes before the pain exacerbates and my job requires constant typing and manipulation of a computer so I can not stand for long.

To top it all off my insurance benefits were supposed to kick in on August 1st, so I scheduled my MRI for Friday August 8th thinking okay this should be no problem. WRONG, as of yesterday I was unable to be found in my insurance company’s database, I have panicked. Finally today the corporate upload was done so those of us who are new that passed our 90 days back in July were finally uploaded to our insurance company. We will see if I get to have my MRI on Friday.

But on the bright side, I did take my sour lemons to make me lemonade with lots of sugar so that JUST FOR TODAY I WILL REMAIN CLEAN AND SOBER!!

Until next time these were the musings of my mind!!! — GLF


Sometimes the Monsters are Real – Ebola

This was a very interesting post that is well worth reading and pondering. Thank you Sadie for writing on this topic.

Just something I was thinking about . . .


I have said before that I think the world is a scary place. There’s a lot of bad shit going on right now. The largest EBOLA outbreak in history, happening in West Africa, has caused me some alarm.

Now I first learned about Ebola back in 1994 when I read “The Hot Zone,” written by Richard Preston. This is an incredibly compelling, horrifying read. I started the book one evening after putting my daughter to bed, and stayed up until about 4:00 a.m. to finish it because I literally could not put it down – I found it to be absolutely riveting. This would be some of the best horror/science fiction ever written, except for the fact that it is real. If you haven’t read it, you might want to just to be enlightened (or scared shitless!).

With global travel what it is, and the ways AIDS spread, I have…

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