“O” is for OBSTINATE – Where do you fall into the definition?

This post is part of Blogging from A to Z April 2015 Challenge. I love this challenge because it forces me to take a look at myself through a different lens based on a different word everyday!

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary gives the following definitions for OBSTINATE with a synonym discussion:

1 : perversely adhering to an opinion, purpose, or course in spite of reason, arguments, or persuasionĀ 

2 : not easily subdued, remedied, or removedĀ 

Synonym discussion: obstinate, dogged, stubborn, pertinacious, mulish mean fixed and unyielding in course or purpose.

Obstinate implies usually an unreasonable persistence <an obstinate proponent of conspiracy theories>.

Dogged suggests an admirable often tenacious and unwavering persistence <pursued the story with dogged perseverance>.

Stubborn implies sturdiness in resisting change which may or may not be admirable <a person too stubborn to admit error>.

Pertinacious suggests an annoying or irksome persistence.

Mulish implies a thoroughly unreasonable obstinacy <a mulish determination to have his own way>.

I love this word! There is nothing wrong with being obstinate depending on the situation. When I was active in my alcoholism/addiction I was extremely obstinate with the unreasonable persistence to drink and use. But I was also extremely stubborn any time my partner, family members, my director/associate director, colleagues and friends insisted that I needed help and that I had to stop drinking and using!! I was constantly very mulish and determined to destroy myself with the alcohol and cocaine.

On February 13, 2014 my being obstinate took a whole different course, this is definitely not an unreasonable persistence. I am no longer stubbornly resisting the change from being an alcoholic/addict because I became “sick and tired of being sick and tired”. What’s funny here is that many folks were obstinate in their own reasoning, arguments or persuasionsĀ that I would not be successful in getting SOBER/CLEAN because they knew how really sick I was and still am! I am just now very pertinacious, stubborn, and obstinate in staying SOBER/CLEAN by going to ANY LENGTH!!!!

I have a new dogged persistence in proving that I am worthy to return back to the University of Texas at San Antonio to continue the great work for the students that attend that great university. Some would say that this determination is pertinacious (irksome/annoying persistence). But to those people I say, you are wrong. There is absolutely nothing wrong with believing in yourself and knowing that you are ready to return to a job that you loved. Some might even say that I am suffering from unreasonable persistence – obstinate in my belief that it CAN and WILL HAPPEN at some point!!!!

So yes in spite of other people’s reasoning, arguments or persuasions, because of my Higher Power whom I choose to call God I will remain SOBER/CLEAN just for this ONE 24 HOUR PERIOD because that is all I care about. With that I will continue my dogged persistence, pertinacious persistence and my obstinacy in my belief and desire to return to The University of Texas at San Antonio!!!

Until next time, that’s “What’s Rattling My Cage!”

O